I was having a conversation the other day about what it means to be a supportive friend. Someone this person was close to was suffering and they wanted to be a good friend, but they weren’t sure what to do or what that would look like. We all go through moments like this – moments we want to help, to fix, to make better. Unfortunately (or maybe fortunately) most situations don’t call for that. In most situations our loved ones come to us not looking for someone to fix their problems, but someone to listen and be present. What we can offer is a warm cup of tea, a hug, a supportive shoulder, someone to say “I hear you and that is really hard.”
It reminded me this morning of the song “Cry” by the Holly Cole Trio . It’s a beautiful song I stumbled upon in Divinity School that reminds me how important it is to be a person, a friend, a chaplain. Here are a few lyrics I’d love to leave you with today…
Cry if you want
I won’t tell you not to
I won’t try to cheer you up
I’ll just be here if you want me
—
I won’t make fun of you
I won’t tell any one
I won’t analyze what you do or you should have done
I won’t advise you to go and have fun
You can cry if you want to